Matt Goldich | July 2003

Circle Gets the Square

Sunday, July 20, 2003

WARNING: DEPRESSING AND RAMBLING ESSAY ALERT Disturbing news has come to my attention and I felt the need to share it with you immediately. Apparently at the age of 23 I have become...old. This was a beautiful weekend here in New York City, 80 degrees and sunny both days. I could have been doing all sorts of youthful things, like going to see indie rock bands perform outdoors or tossing a frisbee around in Central Park. Instead I decided to spend the entire time hanging out in my apartment watching golf with the air conditioning on. I left my apartment for half an hour today, to go to Barnes and Noble to purchase the book "Seabiscuit". In the words of Adam Sandler, what the hell happened to me? This has been on my mind for a few weeks now and the only comfort is in the fact that from talking to some people my own age, they share some of the very same feelings. We can no longer go out three or four nights a week like we could even a year or two ago. Going out on a weeknight when we have to work the next day sounds increasingly unappealing. When we do go out, we purposely select bars that will quiet and empty rather than the loud, crowded places we used to go to in college. It's a strange phenomenon. There are a couple of other signals of my advancing age that I am choosing to ignore or rationalize. For instance I have noticed that I am starting to get "aches and pains". I chalk this up to the fact that I sleep on a futon and do not exercise. I think that's a fair assessment of the situation. Thankfully, I have yet to experience the urge to "settle down". Though I do sometimes view happy couples on the street holding hands with just a tinge of jealousy. Even more disturbing, I often see high school kids making out with each other and think, "You kids are way too young for that sort of behavior." A few months ago I was walking around the University of Pennsylvania campus in Philly when I saw two kids who looked no older than fourteen or fifteen lugging a giant bag of ice into their fraternity house. It was clear they were planning some kind of raging kegger and I found it wholly inappropriate. I wanted to perform a citizens' arrest or something but I was much too timid. I guess I'm not as comfortable approaching people as I was in my younger days. IN HAPPIER NEWS...After a much needed three-week vacation I am getting back on the stand-up horse later this week. I'll be performing this Thursday and Friday in preparation for a return engagement at the Comic Strip next Monday. Here are the details on that show: Monday, July 28 Comic Strip Live 2nd Ave b/t 81st and 82nd St 8:30 pm If you are interested in coming you can call 212-861-9386 to make a reservation. Also please let me know, I have a bunch of tickets that will get you and a guest in without having to pay a cover (there will still be a 2-drink minimum). Hope to see some of you on the 28th. Also stay tuned for more info on the next edition of Comedy Gold at the Gin Mill on Tuesday, August 5. We have an amazing line-up and it will hopefully be our biggest show yet!